


You're Perfect

by ashtonfeels



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-14
Updated: 2013-06-14
Packaged: 2017-12-15 00:02:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/842965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashtonfeels/pseuds/ashtonfeels
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Michael once again resorts to drowning his sorrows in order to hide his feelings towards his band mate, unintentionally breaking Ashton's heart in the process. However, when the pair find themselves in a heated argument, Michael's terrified when he cracks, and thinks he's destroyed their friendship. Michael's convinced that Ashton hates him, but what if it's the complete opposite of that?</p>
            </blockquote>





	You're Perfect

The boys were at their favourite club in London, The Funky Buddha, and had decided to leave after Luke had had a little too much to drink. After hording the blond into a taxi, Calum had sent Ashton back into the club to go and fetch Michael. Michael had plans to get full out wasted the moment the boys stepped through the doors, and Ashton hadn’t seen him all night.

After searching the club, Ashton had finally found the dark haired boy lip-locked with some blonde bimbo. “Mike. Michael, come on, we’re going.” With a sigh, Ashton had resorted to quite literally dragging Michael out of the door seeing as he was just ignoring Ashton’s words. He didn’t do it out of jealousy; he was just looking out for his friend. It wasn’t any surprise that Ashton had a soft spot for the younger boy, yet it was a secret he would never tell.

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Michael shrieked, almost tripping over his own feet. “I was about to score, fuck off!”

Ashton shook his head and lead Michael in the direction of the taxi. “Of course you were, dude.”

The tension in the air was so thick that it could probably have been cut with a knife. Michael was glaring at Ashton who ignored him and resorted to gazing out of the window. Calum sighed knowingly, before wrapping an arm protectively around Luke’s shoulders.

It wasn’t the first time something like this had happened – Michael had gone out with Caspar Lee a few days ago and he ended up drunkenly calling Ashton at the early hours in the morning to pick him up. Ashton, being the lovesick fool he was obeyed his commands without a single thought against it - he felt as if he had to protect Michael. Being the oldest of the band, he had responsibilities. By the time the boys had arrived back to the house, all hell broke loose.

“Fuck you Ashton; you’re always out to ruin my fun,” Michael hissed after, with the help of a half-sober Calum who had just carried Luke inside, was hauled back into the house the band shared in London. “All I wanted was one night, one night where I could let loose and forget about everything. Can’t I even do that? You’re such a selfish prick, fuck you.”

Ashton seethed at his words. He hadn’t done anything wrong – he had been responsible and now he was being punished for it. All he was trying to do is avoid Michael getting bad publicity once again. The last time it happened, he had shut himself out from the boys for weeks because of the hate he had been getting on Twitter. Ashton didn’t want it to happen again, he couldn’t take seeing his best friend so upset. Michael would do the same for him, right? It wasn’t fair and Ashton couldn’t take it anymore. “So you would have rather I left you there swapping saliva with a different girl every five minutes? What would that have done for the band? You’d honestly risk our reputation just for your own needs?” Ashton challenged.

“You watch your mouth, Ash,” Michael warned, shaking a finger at him.

He didn’t understand – Ashton’s mind was reeling at how unfair the whole situation was. “Well I’m sorry for caring, Michael! Luke was throwing up because he was so pissed; we had to bring him home. Would you have preferred that we’d left you there by yourself to stumble home in the early hours of the morning? You could have been mugged,” his voice dropped to a whisper. “You could have been killed.”

“Fuck, Ashton. Why are you always doing this?!” Michael exclaimed with glossy eyes and the smell of alcohol still on his breath. “Just let me have a bit of fun. Just because you’re the oldest doesn’t mean you can boss me around.”

The sound of Luke throwing up into the bucket Calum was holding reminded the boys of their presence. Calum’s eyesight darted between the two feuding boys and he smiled sadly at Ashton before turning back to Luke and rubbing his back.

Ashton scoffed in disbelief. “You call that fun? You called getting wasted out of your mind fun? If you’re going to do this every time you fancy a little bit of fun, you’ll end up getting seriously ill – and I don’t just mean the odd hangover. Haven’t you ever heard of the dangers of alcohol? What about alcohol poisoning? Hasn’t that ever crossed your mind?”

“What the hell is your problem?” Michael growled, his face contorted in anger. “Why are you acting like this?”

They still stood across the living room from each other. “Are you even listening to yourself? You’re pathetic! All I’m doing is looking out for you, looking out for my friend,” Ashton shrieked. “What’s my problem? My problem is you! You’re a fucking mess, Michael. You need to sort yourself out; you disgust me.”

Michael. He never called him Michael. It was usually Mike or Mikey, never Michael unless things were really serious. Ashton regretted the words as soon as they passed his lips. He had never gotten so angry with Michael before. All he was doing was looking out for him, right? Michael took a step forward, his fists clenched in frustration. Before Ashton could speak, the sound of a sickening slap followed by a heavy thud echoed around the room. Calum dropped the bucket he was holding and his mouth dropped open, while a seemingly more sober Luke had wide eyes and was glancing frantically at cowering Ashton.

Ashton lay in a heap on the floor, clutching his face, tears stinging at his eyes. Michael’s heart was pounding in his chest. He looked absolutely terrified as he stood, staring at his hands, as if he couldn’t believe he’d just hit his best friend. “Ash…” Michael trailed off.

His eyes were filled with sadness but Ashton just slid away along the floor as Michael stepped closer. “Ashton…I…” he tried again.

Before Michael could say another word, Ashton was getting up off the floor. A single sob escaped from his parted lips as he sprinted up to his room. Michael saw tears on his face as he ran by, and the guilt churned inside him. The effects of the alcohol he’d previously consumed were no longer existent. His gut wrenched when he replayed the scene in his head – the sickening slap and the heavy thud of Ashton on the tiled floor broke his heart. He’d never felt so terrible in his life.

And Ashton’s face – he looked so betrayed. It shook Michael to his core. He thought back to how Ashton had fearfully rushed away from him and how upset he looked. He soon felt a stinging of tears in his eyes again and Michael dragged a hand through his hair in frustration which was matted with sweat. He couldn’t believe what he had just done. Ashton’s pained expression was etched in his mind; the fact that he backed away when Michael tried to approach him. He’d just thrown away his friendship with the older boy in a matter of seconds – a single drunken moment.

“What the fuck was that?” Calum exclaimed, clambering to his feet when the sound of Ashton running up the stairs broke the silence.  
Michael leant against the wall and slid down until he was sat on the floor. “I don’t know, I…I’m sorry, I don’t know what c-came over me,” Michael’s voice was wavering and he held his head in his hands.

“Why the fuck are you apologising to me?” Calum replied. “I’m not the one who you just smacked.”

“You’d better sort this, dumbass,” Luke muttered from the sofa, not trusting his legs after all the alcohol in his system.

Michael sighed. “I’ve fucked up this time; he’ll never want to speak to me again.”

Glancing down at the helpless boy on the floor, Calum sighed. It was impossible to stay mad at Michael for too long. “This is Ashton we’re talking about, the most carefree dude alive. Of course he will; you were both angry. People don’t think right when they’re mad. All he was doing was looking out for you, man.”  
“I guess so,” Michael muttered in response. Calum outstretched his arm and Michael took it gratefully and clambered to his feet. “Thanks mate.”  
“It’s cool,” Calum nodded in response. “Now go and sort this, you dick.”

Ashton had taken the stairs two at a time, only stopping when he was safe inside his room. He leaned against the door, sobbing. Michael had never hit him before – he never thought any of the boys ever would. He wasn’t stupid; he knew he had pushed Michael too far. The boy felt guilty, but he still hated Michael for what he had done. He had been out of line, but he shouldn’t have been hit. Not just hit, but hit so hard he fell to the floor. It took a lot of force to do something like that, and it had hurt like hell. His face still stung.

Shaking fingers touched his left cheek gingerly, the beginnings of a bruise forming. He’d worry about the bruise later, though – for now he just needed to cry. Why couldn’t Michael understand? All he was trying to do was look out for him. He didn’t want Michael to end up doing something he’d regret. After all of the rumors arising between him and Harry Styles, it had broken the younger boy completely. He had almost ended up disabling his beloved Twitter account because of the malicious comments he’d been receiving from so called ‘fans’.

The fear Ashton felt before going on stage was nothing compared to this; he never thought he’d have to feel scared in his own home. It was the worst feeling in the world – he didn’t want to leave his room. The thought of facing the boys again made his stomach churn. He slid slowly along the door, only stopping when he was in a heap on the floor, his arms wrapped around his legs, clinging to them like they were his life.

When he felt a soft knock at his door, Ashton jumped and slid away, all the way across the room. He curled up next to his bed and saw a timid Michael poking his head around the door. A new wave of tears hit and he leaned against his bed, hoping for some sort of comfort in this mess. “Hey…” Michael trailed off awkwardly.

Slowly he crept inside, closing the door behind him. Ashton didn’t move, he just stayed curled up in a ball. Slowly, hesitantly, Michael sat down next to the older boy. When Michael reached out for Ashton, he voluntarily flinched as soon as their skin made contact. “Ashton…” Michael whispered softly. “Ash, I’m sorry. I-I’m not gonna hurt you.”

Ashton sniffled. Michael spotted a box of tissues on the bedside table and grabbed for them. He offered them to the sobbing boy who took the box greedily. Michael watched as Ashton desperately tried to hide the fact that he had been crying so much – he tried to keep it together but his tears kept coming. “You can cry,” Michael said quietly. “It’s okay.”

After tossing another used tissue in the direction of the bin, his aim probably completely off target, Ashton looked over at Michael, still avoiding his eyes. He could feel Michael’s eyes boring into his face and he felt the most vulnerable and self-conscious he’d ever felt.

Michael gulped and looked at his friend sadly. Ashton was so upset and scared because of him. It almost made him sick to his stomach. “I’m so sorry,” he choked out.  
Tears were spilling from his eyes and he took one of the tissues from the box Ashton was holding, making him flinch once more. Ashton glanced in Michael’s direction, more tears filling his own eyes. “I shouldn’t have said those things,” Ashton told him softly.

“I-I don’t know where it came from…” Michael trailed off. He wanted to pull Ashton into a hug, yet he knew that he couldn’t. “Ash…I feel awful,” he shook his head. “I love you and I never want to see you hurt. Especially by me. I’m sorry.”

“I know you are,” Ashton whispered weakly in response. He sat up, his fear replaced by sadness. It was obvious that Michael felt absolutely terrible, and he hated seeing him so down.

A strangled sob passed through Michael’s lips, and before Ashton knew what he was doing, he was flinging himself at Michael and wrapping his arms around him.

“I forgive you, Mike,” Ashton said softly, wrapping his arms around his torso.

Michael wrapped his arms around Ashton gently, hugging him close. “I love you, Ash,” he told him. “I promise I’ll never, ever hurt you again.”

“I know you won’t,” Ashton mumbled, his voice muffled by Michael’s Rolling Stones shirt.

Michael’s heart was pounding in his chest and his hands soon became clammy with nerves. “It’s just…” he took a deep breath. “It hurts. Loving someone who doesn’t love you back. I was trying to get over them, but it didn’t work…and I took it all out on you, I’m sorry.”

“I know the feeling all too well.” Ashton sighed. “Tell me about her.”

“No way!” Michael whined in response.

Ashton fluttered his eyelashes. “Pleaseeee?”

“Well…She, uh, she’s an amazing listener. And she loves to play on Ikea furniture. She snores more than anything,” Michael grinned to himself.

Ashton laughed weakly, yet his smile didn’t reach his eyes. “Ikea is a damn sexy shop. You have good taste. So, who is she?”

“I can’t tell you,” Michael shot back.

“Come on, you can tell me anything Mikey,” Ashton pressed.

Michael shook his head. “No, not this,” he forced a smile, yet Ashton could see straight through it. “So, tell me about your lady-lover.”

He burst into laughter at his own joke, then looked at Ashton concerned when he didn’t hear Ashton’s infectious laugh. “Mike, I need to tell you something.”

“What?” Michael’s eyebrows knotted in confusion. “Are you okay?”

“I’ve been wanting to tell you this for some time now, but we haven’t really been alone,” he said with a little smile and put his hand on Michael’s knee. Michael’s skin tingled wherever he touched. “Since I joined the band, since I met you, we’ve spent almost all of our time together. When you’re around someone for a long time like that, you can’t help but get feelings for each other.”

Michael interrupted, “What are you trying to say, Ash?”

“Just let me finish,” he said with sad eyes. “When you all invited me to join the band, I was so happy. But not just because it meant we were going to write music together and tour the country as a group. I was happier that I would get to spend every day with you.”

He stopped and took Michael’s hand in his own, rubbing his thumb against his palm. “The more time we spent together, the more I realized that I felt more than just friendship. Every time you touch me it drives me crazy. And I try everything I can to get you to laugh so I can say that I was the one who caused that smile.”

Ashton stopped once more and looked straight into Michael’s eyes. “Michael Gordon Clifford,” he smirked at Michael’s middle name. “From the first day I laid eyes on you, I fell in love. Maybe it was fate that brought us together, like we were meant to be. I don’t know. But I do know that I am truly, madly, deeply, crazy in love with you. I know you probably hate me right now but I had to tell you, I couldn’t stand keeping it from you any longer. Seeing you today with that girl – and all the other times – it ripped me apart. And when I pushed you over the edge, I knew I’d blown it.”

A tear slipped down his cheek, and Michael instinctively leant in and brushed it away with his thumb. Instead of pulling away, he slid a hand to the back of Ashton’s neck and pulled him closer. He could feel the breath of the older boy increase when the boys were nose to nose. It felt so natural, so right.

“Michael, you don’t -”

Michael cut him off. “Shh, I want to,” he whispered. “I never knew you felt like this. I-I love you too, you idiot. That ‘girl’ I was talking about. She doesn’t exist – I was talking about you.”

Michael suddenly leant in and closed the gap causing their lips to touch. Ashton was shocked at first, but when he knew Michael was being serious about this, his eyes fluttered shut and he soon began to return the kiss. Their lips moved in sync and fitted as though they were made for each other. Ashton put his arms around Michael’s waist and pulled him onto his lap so he was literally straddling him. Ashton’s embrace was warm and gentle, and he held Michael close to his chest. Michael ran his gingers through Ashton’s curls and tugged slight, causing a quiet moan to escape from his lips through the kiss.

Ashton opened his eyes when he heard a cough. Calum poked his head around the door and smirked “How did it go?” he asked, causing the two boys to fly apart. “Hold on, don’t answer that. It looks like you’ve sorted things out.

Luke popped his head through the door also and gasped dramatically at the flustered pair sat opposite ends of the bed and put the pieces together. He turned to face Calum and poked him in the stomach. “Hey! Leave them alone, you cock block.” Despite his protests, Luke dragged Calum down the hallway by his shirt. Michael rolled his eyes, before he lazing leaned over and closed the door with a click.

Ashton couldn’t help but laugh as Michael almost ended up falling off the bed in the process. With a pout, Michael turned back to Ashton, lust clearly visible in his eyes. “So…” he trailed off. “Where were we?”

“You tell me,” Ashton smirked in response.  
“I don’t know what else to say. You’re one of my best friends and I love being around you. I get shivers wherever you touch me and I love everything about you. I can’t think of one flaw. You’re perfect. I think…I mean, I know…I love you too,” Michael whispered, just quiet enough for Ashton to hear.

Ashton blushed in response, and tried to hide his face in embarrassment. Michael pulled his hands down to the bed and drew his thumb delicately over the bruising skin on his cheek.

“You’re perfect,” he repeated, before his lips found Ashton’s once more.


End file.
